The 'Shroom:Issue 206/Palette Swap
Director's Notes
Another year is almost halfway over! It's the May 'Shroom!
This month has been relatively quiet for me for games. I'm not planning on getting the Thousand Year Door remaster, but I'm still undecided on the Luigi's Mansion 2 remaster. We'll have to see what my summer has in store for me before I make any plans, especially that Direct coming in June and the announcement of the Switch successor! The rumored console will finally be seeing the light of day!
This month, we have our regular sections in the spotlight! Enjoy your favorite comics and fiction, and I'll see you in this spot next month, all!
Happy reading!
~FunkyK38
Section of the Month
Another month, another winner of Section of the Month! With another first place win, we have winstein (talk) and The ? Panel. Following that is Waluigi Time (talk) and both of his sections, Shmaluigi, Private Investigator and Waluigi Time Comic. We appreciate your votes, and please keep it up in this issue as well!
| PALETTE SWAP SECTION OF THE MONTH | ||||
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Place | Section | Votes | % | Writer |
| 1st | The ? Panel | 17 | 50.00% | winstein (talk) |
| 2nd | Shmaluigi, Private Investigator | 8 | 23.53% | Waluigi Time (talk) |
| 3rd | Waluigi Time Comic | 5 | 14.71% | Waluigi Time (talk) |
Waluigi Time Comic
Drawn by: Waluigi Time (talk)
"The Force" - Waluigi Time Comic
Panel 1
[Mr. Shbeeg looks at Waluigi Time, who is sporting a beard and wearing a cloak]
MR. SHBEEG: So. What's with the beard?
Panel 2
[Waluigi Time flips the hood of the cloak over his head]
WALUIGI TIME: I'm a Jedi now, Shbeeg. Call me Obi-WAAAAN Kenobi
Panel 3
[Waluigi Time stretches out his hand as a glass of water slides across a table]
WALUIGI TIME: Look, I have The Force!
MR. SHBEEG: That's just condensation
Panel 4
[Waluigi Time reveals a lightsaber]
WALUIGI TIME: I even made a lightsaber!
MR. SHBEEG: I've got a bad feeling about this...
Panel 5
WALUIGI TIME: Relax, it'll be-
[With his eyes shut, Waluigi Time accidentally swings the lightsaber and slices through Mr. Shbeeg's computer panel]
Panel 6
[Mr. Shbeeg's panel has now turned to static. The upper half falls off of the wall and lands on the floor with a loud WHUMP]
WALUIGI TIME: Oops
Shoutout to winstein whose transcript idea I have shamelessly borrowed!
The ? Panel
{Dry Bones loses balance as the boxes lost their balance, the shaggy costume also dropping}
{Dry Bones' falls head first on impact of the floor, causing the head to bounce into an empty box, along with the shaggy thing, causing it to cover Dry Bone's head}
{Lakitu hurriedly arrives at the scene, unaware of the stowaway, and quickly seals the box and slaps an address slip on the box}
{The Lakitu zips to a Paratroopa postman to send the package. The head of the Dry Bones is unconscious}
{An aeroplane zooms past the sky, showing that the package is delivered over a long distance. Dry Bones is unconscious during the entire flight}
{A Koopa Troopa arrives at a museum with the box to deliver it to the Toad. Toad signs off the proof of delivery while the Koopa Troopa wipes off a sweat due to fatigue}
{The museum displays the Dry Bones' head above the shaggy costume in a glass box labelled "Caveman's Headwear". The Dry Bones' head has a grumbled expression while Toad presents the new "artefact" as a Koopa Troopa and Theet looks at it.}
Transcript
{The glass of the museum display is shown to be broken, confusing the Toads}
{Meanwhile, a speck is travelling across the sea at high speed}
{Dry Bones' head is in a shocked expression as it zooms towards a castle, where its body is still located at.}
{The castle blows up from the sheer impact of Dry Bones' head returning to where the body is, shattering not only the castle, but Dry Bones as well.}
Shmaluigi, Private Investigator
Written by: Waluigi Time (talk)
Lock and Key: Part 2
"Sorry, did you just say... him?"
Alright, let me back up just a hair. So there I was, in the middle of tracking down a missing key for my client. My investigation led me to a friend of his, one Mr. Bumphrey, but talking to him left me taken aback by one peculiar wording choice.
"Yeah?" Bumphrey replied, clearly confused.
"So... This key isn't a thing, but a person," I said, still trying to wrap my head around this new development.
"Oh, oh no... He didn't tell you about Keyton, did he?"
"No. No, he did not," I replied, repressing the very strong urge to go smack a Clubba.
"Sorry about that... Bubba's a good friend of mine, but sometimes there's just nothing going on upstairs, you know?"
"Yeah, that's becoming rapidly clear."
"I guess he didn't properly explain the situation, then. Keyton's one of those Keyzer guys, and they're roommates, I guess?"
Well, this just changed the whole case. Usually, a key doesn't just get up and walk away. Here, that was a firm possibility.
"Did they seem to get along well?"
"I mean, yeah, I think so. I don't think they're super tight-knit or anything, but I wasn't aware of any problems between them."
"Hm... Thank you for your time, Mr. Bumphrey. This has been the most fruitful conversation of the investigation so far."
"Oh, you're welcome. Good luck out there, I hope you can solve this for him."
With that bombshell, the next order of business was to head back to Mr. Bubba's house and set the record straight this time. One problem, though - I was only vaguely familiar with Keyzers, which could present a bit of a problem. I figured that my brother Shmwario might from his stint as a treasure hunter, though, so I decided to give him a call as I drove back.
"Hey bro, it's me."
"You called at the perfect time! You're never gonna guess who just showed up."
"Oh, uh, who?"
"Shmaisy's back in town! She's crashin' with me 'cuz you weren't around."
"Oh, that's great. Listen-"
"You're not gonna believe this, she was hasslin' me about leavin' soda on the counter and it gettin' warm- Yeah I'm tellin' him! You were bein' weird about it!"
At this rate, I wasn't going to get an answer before I got back to Mushroom Hills. "Can you put that thought on pause for a minute? I need to talk to you about the case I'm working on."
"Ohhh, you need help from the great Shmwario, eh? Bwahaha! Okay, whatcha got?"
"I ran into a situation involving a Keyzer, but I don't know much about them. Seemed like something that might be up your alley, given your treasure hunting experience and all."
"Oh yeah, the ghostie guys with a key for a schnozz! People liked usin' 'em to guard their valuables 'cuz you don't really have to worry about anyone stealin' 'em or makin' a copy. 'Course that was way back before all the fancy-shmancy ghost catchin' tech you got goin' on today, so they're not really too popular anymore. Plus, havin' your keys on someone else's face didn't always go so well, I heard."
"You mean like them leaving on their own?"
"Yeah, probably. Most of 'em are pretty lazy, but they still got a mind of their own so you never know. I never really bothered diggin' into all that history baloney 'cuz I don't really care, though. Just get in there and grab the treasure, you don't have to be a nerd about it!"
"Well, thanks for getting me up to speed..."
"What, you're not gonna tell me about the juicy details?"
"Oh, it's not really anything too interesting. Just a guy who had one and lost him... But you know what, he didn't even tell me about it, I went on a whole wild goose chase for an ordinary key and I finally found out about it from the guy's friend. Can you believe that?"
"You gotta be kidding! I hope you punched him in the nose."
"I haven't talked to him yet. But I'm not going to do that."
"You should..."
"Punching clients is bad for business. Not that you'd know much about getting business," I said jokingly. Shmwario gives me enough trouble, so when the setup is there, you can bet I'm going to tease him a little.
"Hey!"
"Heh heh... Well, say hi to Shmaisy for me."
"Okay. Hey, maybe we can all go out for Kellonald's when you get back."
"Sure, why not."
I arrived back at Mr. Bubba's house again, thinking about how much of a mess this trip would be if you were following along on GPS. I hopped out of my car and pounded on the front door, waiting until the Clubba finally opened up.
"You didn't tell Shmaluigi the key was a person!" I yelled, partially to be heard over the cacophony of construction, but mostly because I was mad.
"Oh, I- wait, what?" he replied with a confused expression, then waved me into the house to get away from the noise. "I must have mentioned that..."
"Obviously you didn't or we wouldn't be having this conversation. Your friend Mr. Bumphrey explained the details. Thankfully, he's off the hook for now."
"See, I told you! So it must have been Dooglas Cain," he replied, pounding his fist into his hand with renewed resolve.
"Well, not so fast. You can't go around catching ghosts with a butterfly net or anything, you need special equipment to do that. Not that this rules it out completely, but there wasn't anything of the sort in his office, at least."
"Maybe you can go to his house..."
"No more wild goose chases. Besides, we also have to consider the possibility that Mr. Keyton left of his own volition. Have you two been having any problems lately? Disagreements or arguments, perhaps?"
"No, everything was fine. I don't charge him rent or anything, I buy all the groceries, and I even pay him with what I can. I don't think he would've suddenly left without telling me."
"Hm... Okay, Shmaluigi has a plan. A key is worthless without a lock, right? There was no tampering with the frame, so Mr. Keyton should be back soon, possibly along with whoever did this. And when that happens, we're going to be here waiting."
"Ohh... You mean like a stakeout!"
"Exactly. Do you have a flashlight?"
"I have one around here... somewhere."
"Oh, and some coffee, if you don't mind."
The plan was simple, just wait around in the kitchen until someone would hopefully show up. Mr. Bubba didn't care to stay awake and went to bed, but as for myself, this could easily turn into a night of no sleep, hence the coffee.
Turns out, standing around and waiting for something that might not even happen is really boring when you're doing it by yourself.
Finally, after spending several hours studying the wallpaper enough that even with the lights out I had noted several spots where it was peeling, I heard something over in the dining room and sprung into action.
"AHA!" I shouted, leaping through the air and dramatically brandishing my now illuminated flashlight, coming face to face with a Keyzer removing the picture frame from the wall.
"GAH! Watch where you're pointing that thing, guy!" he shouted, now using the frame to shield himself from the light.
"You're Mr. Keyton, aren't you?" I asked.
"Y-yeah..."
"Mr. Bubba, your prodigal key is back!" I shouted, only to be met with distant snoring in response. Guess I'd have to handle this one myself. "Okay then... So, Mr. Keyton, care to explain what you're doing here?"
"I was, uh..."
"Trying to get the combination for Mr. Bubba's safe?"
The Keyzer hesitated for a bit before resigning himself to the situation. "Maybe."
"Any particular reason?"
"Well, um... L-look, I don't know what your deal is, but you don't live with this guy! I have to be the guardian of this stupid lock and he barely pays me anything!"
Apparently, we made enough of a racket by now to wake up Mr. Bubba. He walked into the room, still clearly half asleep. "Huh? What... what's going on?"
"Shmaluigi caught your key friend trying to pull off a heist," I told him.
"Oh. That's nice," he replied absentmindedly, nearly falling asleep right there.
Deciding he was mostly a lost cause, I turned my attention back to Mr. Keyton. "Still, that's no reason to try and swipe the poor guy's house out from under him. You don't seem to have it too difficult here."
His face turned remorseful as he continued to float in silence for a moment. "You know about Dooglas Cain, right?"
"Yes, we've become acquainted during all this."
"The last time he was here, after Bubba refused to sell again, he pulled me aside and offered to cut me a deal if I'd help him get the deed to the house. It was... tempting. I didn't take it at first! But the more I thought about it, the more it grabbed at me. So I finally gave in and left last night to settle things with him," he said, then sighed. "But it was stupid, I let my greed get the better of me. I'm... I'm sorry."
No response came from Mr. Bubba, who had fallen asleep on the floor and was back to snoring. It was almost amusing that he slept through his suspicions actually being vindicated.
"Looks like you two are going to have to work this out in the morning," I said.
Mr. Keyton rolled his eyes, the first break in the tension all night. "Wouldn't be the first time he fell asleep mid-conversation."
With all the answers I needed, I barged into Mr. Cain's office early the next morning, ignoring the protests of his secretary. I had my guy.
"The jig is up, Cain. Keyton told us everything," I said with my finger pointing straight at the Doogan's face.
"Oh, he did?" he replied, with a sort of faux politeness that I instantly recognized. It brought to mind a certain regional manager I unfortunately knew...
"That's right, and you're not going to be practicing real estate again for quite a while."
"But no crime was actually committed, Mr. Shmaluigi."
"Don't try to bluff your way out of this. You struck a deal with Mr. Keyton to get your hands on property that wasn't yours, that's conspiracy."
Mr. Cain chuckled. "If a lock uses a Keyzer to open it, then the Keyzer in question has equal rights to any of its contents."
"Wait... what?"
Was... was he right? My line of work naturally required a pretty decent understanding of Mushroom Kingdom law, but this was very niche. I had the feeling that I would need the help of an attorney to untangle this mess. Thankfully, I knew just where to find one, and I had a good feeling that she wasn't up to much at the moment.
"Don't go anywhere," I grumbled, then turned around to go get to the bottom of this.
To be continued...
Thanks for reading the latest edition! I am once again lacking in much to say, so I'll keep this short and let you get on with reading the rest of this issue. Be sure to come back next month for the conclusion of Lock and Key!
Sport Report: The Movie
Written by: ClawgripFan9001
World 2: Frolicking Through The Forests - Part 2
After having finished their snacks, the heroes continued their trek through Shriek Forest before coming across a muscular hippopotamus known as a Zulk. The Zulk was one of the more elite soldiers of General Zellon's army. The group looked at the Zulk in awe.
"Argh, pluck me pirate flags! Look at 'ow huge this lad be!" ClawgripFan9001 exclaimed in shock.
"I agree, this guy is definitely buff…" Winston chimed in, a worried look resting on his face.
"How are we gonna get past this guy?" Diddy Kong wondered out loud.
"Don't worry. I know just the way to get through him." Donkey Kong grinned as he walked up to the Zulk, which got its attention.
"Stop! Where do you think you're going, chumps?" The Zulk asked ClawgripFan9001 and Company with a piercing glare, folding its arms in front of its chest.
"We're competing in the Zellon Games, pal, and we were on our way to the next event we were gonna be competing in." Donkey Kong explained to the Zulk.
The Zulk raised a curious eyebrow. "The Zellon Games? Which event?" He asked Donkey Kong, trying to make sure that the ape wasn't lying to him.
"Hammer Throw." Donkey Kong replied, hoping that Hammer Throw was one of the events that the Zellon Games housed, because if not, ClawgripFan9001 and Company would be in major trouble right about now.
The Zulk's face lit up with glee upon hearing that. "Hammer Throw? What a coincidence! I'm competing in that event too! How about I take you guys to the stadium where the event is being held?" He offered the heroes.
"Sounds like a plan, pal! Let's head there right away!" Donkey Kong grinned and gave the Zulk a thumbs up, approving its idea.
"Right! Off we go then!" The Zulk beamed before the group was teleported away to the stadium where the Hammer Throw event was going to be held. Every single member of the heroes group competed in the event, but only Donkey Kong appeared to be able to throw the hammer the farthest distance, with the Zulk finishing in second place and Funky Kong finishing in third place.
"Oh no! General Zellon is gonna chew me out big time for losing this event!" The Zulk exclaimed in dismay before disappearing in a puff of smoke, having been defeated by losing out on first place. The heroes were then teleported back to Shriek Forest.
"Yar, nice goin', Donkey Kong! Ye really got us through there!" ClawgripFan9001 complimented Donkey Kong's skills in talking the Zulk into challenging them to an event.
"Thanks, ClawgripFan9001! I do have my moments sometimes!" Donkey Kong grinned as he flashed a thumbs up at the large Sidestepper.
"Well, now that the path has been cleared, I'd say that we're good to move on to the next area!" Dixie Kong beamed as the group continued to make their way through Shriek Forest.
After walking through Shriek Forest for a while, the group ended up at a Warp Pipe, and it had a bunch of Air Helmets placed next to it. "Yar, would ye take a look at that! There be a bunch o' Air Helmets o'er here!" ClawgripFan9001 pointed out.
"You reckon that means that we'll go underwater when we go through this pipe?" Winston asked him with a curious tilt of his head.
"I'd say so, laddie. Since I be a Sidestepper, I can breathe underwater, but fer the rest o' ye, I recommend ye use one o' these Air Helmets ta survive." ClawgripFan9001 told the rest of the group.
"It's a good thing us Lakitus are able to ride our clouds underwater, as well as that all my camera equipment is waterproof, or else I would've been screwed." The Lakitu cameraman spoke up as everyone started putting on their Air Helmets.
"Aye, everyone be ready? Then off we go!" ClawgripFan9001 exclaimed as everyone went through the Warp Pipe, after which they ended up in an underwater area of Shriek Forest, which appeared to be rather dark.
"Gee, it's kinda dark…" Winston remarked as he looked around underwater.
"Did anyone happen to bring a light?" Funky Kong asked the group.
"I did. My camera happens to have a light on it that could be of use in traversing these dark waters." The Lakitu cameraman replied as he turned on the light on his camera, which proceeded to light up the area.
"Ah, phew. Glad we've got some light now." Winston sighed in relief before the group began to swim through the area. A little bit later, the group was ambushed by a pair of sharks known as Big Biters.
"What in the darn diddly squat are you people doing here? General Zellon doesn't want your type around here, so turn back immediately and don't come back!" One of the Big Biters told the group in a firm tone of voice.
"Make us, ye hurley burlers!" ClawgripFan9001 replied with a just as firm tone of voice.
"Dude! Bogus! Take one step closer, and we'll show you the ropes in an event!" The other Big Biter replied to ClawgripFan9001, who proceeded to take one step closer to him and his companion. "He brought it! It's go time, dork!" The Big Biter spoke before the group was beamed away to the Aquatics Center, where the next event, the 100m Breaststroke was going to be held.
"In Line Number One, ClawgripFan9001!" An announcer spoke as ClawgripFan9001 waved to the crowd. "In Line Number Two, Diddy Kong!" The announcer spoke as Diddy Kong waved to the audience. "In Line Number Three, Terry the Big Biter!" The announcer spoke as one of the Big Biters waved to the audience. "And in Line Number Four, Vinnie the Big Biter!" The announcer finished as the other Big Biter waved to the audience. "On your marks, get set, GO!" The announcer spoke once more as the four competitors in the event went swimming forward, with all of them fighting tooth and nail to finish first in the event, which resulted in Diddy Kong claiming first place, Terry the Big Biter claiming second place and Vinnie the Big Biter claiming third.
The Big Biters exclaimed in dismay at having been defeated by Diddy Kong, after which they proceeded to disappear into a puff of smoke, with the heroes beaming back to the dark waters of Shriek Forest immediately afterwards.
"Hee hee! Goes to show that being quick and nimble like me has its uses!" Diddy Kong giggled as he clapped his hands happily.
"It sure do, laddie! Now let's continue on our way, there's prob'bly more aquatic baddies where that came from!" ClawgripFan9001 agreed as the group continued on their way through the dark waters of Shriek Forest, coming across three piranha-like fishes known as Little Nippers.
"So I was invited to General Zellon's castle the other day, and I was sitting in this bowl in his throne room, and General Zellon was just gushing at this picture of Queen Krackadona of the Light Lands." One of the Little Nippers told his friends, after which they all started snickering.
"Oh, you gotta put a cork in it, man…" Another one of the Little Nippers snickered before turning around and noticing the heroes. "Yikes! It's the heroes Commander Wilhelm warned us about!" It exclaimed.
"Yar, it be a shame we came in 'ere too late, 'cause we woulda loved ta 'ear more o' yer matey's 'ilarious story." ClawgripFan9001 joked with a grin.
"Yeah, sorry to interrupt you comedians, but we gotta get through here." Dixie Kong chimed in as she folded her arms in front of her chest with a pout.
"How about this? If you beat us at 100m Backstroke, we'll let you guys pass, and we'll tell you the rest of our hilarious story." One of the Little Nippers offered the heroes.
"Sounds like a fair deal to me. Let's do this." Dixie Kong told the Little Nippers before the group was once again beamed away to the Aquatics Center to participate in 100m Backstroke.
"In Line Number One, Dixie Kong!" The announcer from before spoke as Dixie Kong waved to the crowd. "In Line Number Two, Lester the Little Nipper!" One of the Little Nippers then proceeded to wave to the crowd. "In Line Number Three, Jerry the Little Nipper!" The second of the Little Nippers waved to the crowd in response. "And In Line Number Four, Bobby the Little Nipper!" The last of the Little Nippers then waved to the crowd.
"On your marks…Get set…GO!" The announcer exclaimed as the four participants went swimming forward. Much like Diddy Kong, Dixie Kong was quick and nimble in the water, which proved to be very useful as she made it to the other side of the pool and back before the three Little Nippers did, who proceeded to disappear into puffs of smoke upon defeat like most of General Zellon's other troops before them. The heroes were then beamed back to Shriek Forest, being underwater still.
"There we go, all clear!" Dixie Kong said with a beaming smile as she clapped her hands happily. The rest of the group nodded in agreement with this statement, impressed with Dixie clearing the event so quickly.
"You cleared that event rather quickly, Dixie! I'm sure that if the Zellon Games have an Olympic Record, you might just have broken said record for this event!" Winston told Dixie in a joyful tone of voice.
Dixie giggled at that. "I would just love to see the look on General Zellon's face if I did end up breaking the Olympic Record for the event. But there's time to think about that later, I think we should make our way towards the next castle, where more of our friends are being held captive." She suggested, to which everyone nodded in agreement as they continued making their way through the waters of Shriek Forest.
And that's it for Part 2 of the second chapter of Sport Report: The Movie! I added in a couple of references to a few Mario games and even a few non-Mario games into this part, see if you can find them all! Additionally, for the majority of the enemies ClawgripFan9001 and Company faced in this part, I took inspiration from a bunch of enemies from the Donkey Kong Country series, with Zulk being based on Krusha, Big Biters being based on Chomps and Little Nippers being based on Bitesize, respectively. Anyway, that's about all I got to say here! I hope to see you guys again next month as ClawgripFan9001 and Company continue to traverse the dangers of Shriek Forest!
| The 'Shroom: Issue 206 | |
|---|---|
| Staff sections | Staff Notes • The 'Shroom Spotlight • Poochy's Picks • Credits |
| Features | Fake News • Fun Stuff • Palette Swap • Pipe Plaza • Critic Corner • Strategy Wing |
