List of Super Paper Mario quotes

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The following is a list of quotes from Super Paper Mario; they are listed alphabetically by character.

Bowser

• "Bwah ha ha! Will I marry Peach? Are you kidding me? The answer's YESSSSSSSS!
• "Bwa ha ha ha ha! "We're under attack!" You jokers are the best!"
• "Hey who are those hairy guys in the back? We SHAVE around here, minions."
• "Bah! Mario... AND Luigi?! How'd you get in here?...What? My front gate was open?! How many times have I told those idiots?! If you're the last in, LOCK THE GATE!"
• "I'll tell you who doesn't make even a little bit of sense... Count Bleck!
• "Enough! Release Princess Peach, right now! I'm on a schedule over here!
• "MARIO! ...and Princess Peach?! Why do you ALWAYS have to do that. That's like the 1000th time you've shown up at my castle and screwed everything up!"
• "No more sequels! It's gonna end right here, right now. ONCE AND FOR ALL!"
• "But... But I'm Bowser! I'm grade-A, 100% prime-cut final boss! I'm going to take over the world any day now! No way am I helping Mario! He's always trashing my awesome plans."
• "What'd you say? If the world ends, there's not gonna be any world for me to rule?"
• "Don't get all cuddly with me, Mario."
• "NO! I'M NOT SWEET!"
• "Fine... C'mon. Let's get your stupid Precious Heart, or whatever you call it."
• "Yeah! Anyone who wears a cape and a monocle is just begging for a beating."
• "Trust me, any problem comes up, I'll stomp it into next week! I'll Bowserize it!"'
• "Who are you supposed to be, Mr. Frilly Pants? You gonna tie me a balloon animal?"
• "Bwahah! You're such an idiot! This place makes me stronger too!"
• "Pbbtth! Wanna know how to thank me, bugface? Just stay outta my way, OK?"
• "Oh YEAH! I can breathe! But now my nose itches! Man, I hate space!"
• "Good gravy, you're ugly!"
• "Space niblet! You OK?"
• "Hrmm... Mr. L. What a nutjob."
• "Huuuuurgh! Mt brain hurts! I can't keep up with plot points this complicated!"
• "Count Bleck, Floro Sapiens, whatever. Stomping fools is my business! Point me out to a fool, and I'll stomp 'em! I don't even need a reason!"
• "What am I, blind? Shut up."
• "Hey O'Fatty! Take it easy! You're gonna blow out your beard, pal, seriosly."
• "You need stomping. And I'm a Stomptologist."
• "Man, what a crybaby."
• "I've had egg-salad-sandwiches chunkier than this guy."
• "You part of that idiot's crew? Get back and report to your boss, you lazy worm!"
• "Oh, PLEASE! You know what you smell like, weirdo? FEAR. Stop crying and fight!"
• "Whoa whoa WHOA! I don't fight veggies!"
• "Think you can dent a shell as burly as THIS, pretty boy? Let those Cragnons go!"
• "Hey! I'm not fat! I just got a big shell."
• "Minions need to learn respect."
• "That Mr. L freak is a total insano."
• "Where am I?! And why do these jerks in shades keep jumping me?! And what's with the dark? And Peach isn't here... and I'm hungry! What did I do to deserve this?!"
• "You wanna break up what me and Peach have going!"
• "Dang! Why do I always lose?! What is WRONG with me?!"
• "She's gotta be feeling lonely without her burly, awesome hubby at her side!"
• "Hey, there's no shame in being smacked down by a huge, studly boss!"
• "Hey, Super Stupid Bros.! Get the princess into the next room NOW!"
• "Come on! Man up a little. You never give up this easy when you attack MY castle!"
• "You believed in your prophecy, and we believed in mopping the floor with you!"

Count Bleck

• "Bleh HEH HEH HEH BLECK!"
• "Bleh heh heh heh heh... This pleases Count Bleck!"
• "WHAT?! ... Spat Count Bleck in utter disbelief.
• "Count Bleck does not care about any world! They are all meaningless."
• "Count Bleck is the destroyer of worlds."

Dimentio

• "So very nice to meet you... and your mustache!"
• "I am Count Bleck's master of dimensions, the pleaser of crowds, I am...Dimentio!"
• "Ciao!"
• "And so I strike, like a sudden windstorm at a kindergarden picnic!"
• "And so you've come to play, like late-sleeping toddlers!"
• "You must be Bowser. I knew the moment I saw the flailing nubbins you call arms."
• "And now, we must duel like two, glearing banjos on a moon-lit stoop!"
• "Ah ha ha ha. And so we meet again, like two large, burly dinosaurs with indigestion!"
• "Now remember kids: eat your vegetables to grow big!"
• "So, you spit upon my offer? You have wasted my time. And for that, your game ends. I think I'll start with the green one. The shag upon his lip will make a fine trophy!"
• "And so I strike, like a speeding dodgeball at an echong gymnasium!"
• "I had you do all the sweaty labor for me."
• "Count Bleck! You looked so tattered and pathetic, I nearly forgot about you!"

Flint Cragley

• "Lesser Cragnons would weep softly."
• "Suddenly... Out of the cave mists... mysterious, slavering creatures lurched into view!"
• "Had the gods of adventure forsaken us?"

Mimi

• "Surprise! It's me, Mimi!
• "Coins?! No one uses COINS anymore, you peasants! I SPIT on your coins!"
• "You DUMMIES! The only reason I'm here is to GET in the way!"
• "I'm not all soft n' cuddly like the count is."
• "I like getting what I want, and I'll do whatever I have to to get it!"
• "You're the one that's always having to get rescued by boys. THAT'S embarassing!"
• "Boy, it sure would be sad if your boyfriends had to cry over spilled Peaches!"
• "Gosh, I could follow your big smile anywhere, Count!"
• "I got hired on by merlee as her maid for real this time!"

Luigi / Mr. L

• "That's my bro, always bouncing back! Like me! I bounce too!" - Luigi
• "I'm my bro's bro." - Luigi
• "The G-Great Luigi, you say? A... A daring defender? ...Me? Then I've got no choice! Luigi must spring into action! My fans need me!" - Luigi
• "Oh, me? Just one of Count Bleck's more promising minions. The Green Thunder... MR. L!" - Mr. L
• "Just because you're in red doesn't mean you're strong. Have at you!" - Mr. L
• "Ooh, the evil king of all charlatans! Do I look scared? Have at you!" - Mr. L
• "Hey, Mr. Getsfoiledallthetimebytheredguywiththemustache! I'll foil your FACE!" - Mr. L
• "I uh... got to go deflavorize the Brobot's uh... Flavorizer." - Mr. L
• "Hey there, butterball!" - Mr. L
• "Hey, King Incompetant! I'm gonna hatch an evil plan on your FACE! Have at you!" - Mr. L
• "T-Toad?! What? What happened? Why are you so crazy?" - Luigi
• "Everyone runs out of extra lives sometime." - Luigi
• "Quiet, you big Bowser! We know you kidnapped Princess Peach! Now where'd you put her?!" - Luigi
• "Looks like your pure heart thing got broken. I guess pure hearts can't handle the end of the world. Heh. Whatever, I'll swipe it just for kicks." - Mr. L

Luvbi

• "I am sorry...that thou art so hairy."
• "Pray, I would understand this! Is yon Peach the lady friend of Mario?"
• "Oh, verily? But the damsel looms large in his regard, is this not so? A one-sided crush then, mayhap."
• "Heareth me, princess of silly peaches?"

O'Chunks

• "CHUNKS AWAY!"
• "JUNIOR?! C'mere un' I'll introduce yeh to Fist Jr. an' his wee pal, Slappie!"
• "A Stomptolo- 'EY! SHUT IT! Don't yeh go tryin' teh be wittier than me, yeh frog!"
• "Maybe I misubderstood that weirdo..."
• "YOU CRAZED LOON!"
• "BRO-CCOLI! CAB-BAGE! AS-PARA-GUS!" - O'Chunks brainwashed into "O'Cabbage"
• "Warrior rule # 1: "Never fight on an empty stomach! 'Tis Madness!""
• "'Ow could yeh be chunkier than I? Yer naught but a bloomin' turtle!"
• "Yer hands are quiverin' like a ladle of me mum's lard gravy."
• "Ah; she lies like a wee rug, this lass!"

Princess Peach

• "Ewwww, what WAS that?! What in the world did you just make me eat?!"
• "Oh, what's the matter, little girl? Did I spank Mimi a little too hard?"
• "You've been very, very bad, but I can't just leave you here to die."
• "I fell through too, and landed right on Bowser! It was a surprisingly soft landing..."
• "How lovely! The bells are giving their blessing to Tippi and Bleck..."

Squirps

• "You're the ones looking for the Pure Heart, squirple? Hm! Cuter than I thought!"
• "I... I have to go potty! I REALLY have to go, squirk! I can't hold it anymore!"
• "At this rate, Squirps is going to have an accident."
• "Why are you staring like that? Are you falling for Squirps?!"

Tippi

• "Who are you REALLY, you incontinent little imp?"
• "What a wretch."
• "Why would you do this?! How COULD you do this?!"
• "If the worlds have no meaning, does that mean OUR meeting was meaningless, as well! Answer me,
• "Don't worry Dimentio we'll leave a footnote to the prophecy about your failure."

Blumiere!"

• "Pure Hearts are the very feelings of our souls."
• "Nothing is decided intirely by fate, you know... All things determine their destinies."
• "Blumiere is gone now there is only Count Bleck! Bleh he he he!"

Toad

• "M-M-M-M-M-M-M-Mario! Help! It's Sh-sh-sh-sh-shocking... Mushroom Castle... RAIDED! Princess Peach... STOLEN!"
• "We're counting on you, Mario...Bros.!"