List of Super Mario Bros. (film) quotes

This is a list of quotes from the Super Mario Bros. film. They are listed by character.

Mario Mario

• "Mario Brother's plumbing. No leak too small."
• Luigi: "I'm gonna kill'em!"
  Mario: "No, you're not gonna kill'em. Not if I get there first. I'm gonna break every bone in their bodies and then I'm gonna kill'em. I’m REALLY gonna kill'em."
• "How're we gonna get into Koopa's Tower? I've got two words for you -- im-possible."
• Luigi: "Mario, did you see that? It's trying to communicate."
  Mario: "Luigi, it's a mushroom."
• "WHAT!? You're gonna arrest a guy for being a plumber!?"
• "And he is... outta here!"
• "See ya later, alligator!"
• "Luigi, stop, you'll be talkin' to the mildew in the shower next!"”let’s hit the bricks”

Luigi Mario

• "Right now, on Miraculous World, this guy just found out he was in another dimension."
• Luigi: "Well ya know, we got a van."
  Daisy: "It's nice!"
  Luigi: "Yeah, well. -- ...no, no -- I'm asking you if you would want a ride? Oh, but, ah, it's broken now..."
• "Your name's Daisy isn't it? I overheard your name was Daisy -- You know, I haven't heard that name around here, it's really nice, too -- Well, I have heard it, 'cause it's the flower and everything. But not like I hang around flower shops or nothin' like that."
• "It's a pleasure to meet me! I mean, it's a pleasure to meet you."
• Luigi: "Do you eat?"
  Daisy: "Yeah..."
  Luigi: "Dinner?"
  Daisy: "Sure..."
  Luigi: "Tonight?"
  Daisy: "Oh... okay!"
• "Mario, I got a feelin'. I got a feelin' we ain't in Brooklyn no more."
• "You didn't save us, that tunnel just sneezed us out and that giant booger just caught us mid-air. That's what saved us."
• "WHERE'S Daisy, butt-breath!?"
• "Not until you give us Daisy, biscuit-head!"
• "Who cares, anyway? Just give me my tool belt!"
• "Nothing's impossible, Mario. Improbable, unlikely, but never impossible."
• "Trust the fungus."

Daisy

• "I'm the boss here."
• "Thank God you're here! I mean, you're a plumber, right?"
• "Luigi, help me!"
• "Where's my father?"
• "Uh, I'm a vegetarian. I don't eat anything with a face."
• "I hope he's alright."
• "The rock will merge our two dimensions!"
• "Only I can stop it."
• "Yoshi... I guess we're both prisoners here, huh?"
• "Listen! I know this is going to sound a little strange, but... I want you to meet my father."
• "He used to be the leader here until... Koopa turned him into... all this fungus."
• Daisy: "Oh, how's Daniella? Is she alright?"
  Mario: "Daniella, that's right! I promised to take her to Wrestlemania."
• Daisy: "Mario! Luigi! We need your help. You're not gonna believe this..."
  Mario: "Oh, I believe it!"

President Koopa

• "(bathing in mud) Do you know what I love about mud? It's clean and it's dirty at the same time."
• "Perhaps if I could just make you idiots smarter, you won't screw-up this time."
• "Here's what's logical to me... if you do not return with the plumbers and the rock... I shall personally kill you."
• "After the merge, it will be nice to see the humans de-evolve, won't it? What is it they come from? I keep forgetting, its, uh, mice or something...
• "Disgusting mammals."'
• "Well, my, my, looks like you got up on the wrong side of the nest this morning."
• "That I am, ruler of all you see. A few miserable streets and endless desert."
• "My, my, you have let yourself go! See, I'm not such a bad guy, you always wanted to be everywhere, well now you are. And I wanna tell you something, you can go ahead and choke this little Mushroom Kingdom all you want, cuz', I'm out of here. I'm out into the bigger world! I gotta a couple of plumbers bringin' me the rest of the meteorite. Soon to be dead plumbers. And by the way, you really oughta pull yourself back together again... slime bucket!"
• "BOB-OMB!"
• "King Koopa here. I'd like the Koopa Special. Yes, dino, lizard, hold the mammal, no worms and, uh, spicy."
• "Princess! Ready to help me destroy the human kinds? Muster the Goombas! Hand out the De-Evolution Guns! Prepare for destiny! Where's my pizza?"
• "I need you to find Daisy and give me her rock. Then I can rule both worlds!"
• "Good lord, what was I thinking?"
• "I shall personally de-evolve you for singing Anti-Koopa songs."
• "Plumbers? Plumber alert."'
• WHAT?! NOOOOO!!!
• "(realizing Mario doesn’t have the meteorite piece) Its merging. You don’t have the rock, you filthy mammal. (laughs) We’re MERGING! (laughs again before merging into the other world)
• "Its Brooklyn. My world! Give me that Devo-Gun! (Koopa tries to shoot Mario, but instead hits Scapelli, who is transformed into a chimpanzee. Koopa points at him and laughs) Monkey!"
• "STUPID!"

Toad

• "Hey guys, cheer up. It could be worse. (starts singing) Ain't got no water anywhere...Food's bad, so's the air...Got no resources, in a great big stupor...All because of the evil King Koopa!" - Toad's Anti-Koopa Song.
• "Could you please tell me your name?" - Toad when he meets Mario & Luigi in their cell.
• "What a lousy kingdom ever since Koopa took over. And YOU, Koopa! You're a lousy leader!...Our old king! You tried to get rid of him, but the king is everywhere, including the museum and tunnel. You can't get rid of him. Never!" - Toad's response before Koopa de-evolves him.
• "Uh...A Goomba ate it. And I am NOT the princess!" - Toad's answer after Koopa asks where his pizza is.

Lena

• "Everyone deserves what they've earned! And I've earned this!"

Big Bertha

• "Come get it, big boy."

Dialogue

Luigi: (as he drives the van) You know, I read that sea turtles travel thousands of miles on instinct.

Mario: Not in New York traffic, they don't.

---

Officer: (interrupts Toad’s song) You know the law Toad.

Mario: Hey! Wait a minute. You can’t arrest a guy for singing a song.

Officer: For anti-Koopa songs we can. (then he notices the tools on their belts and pulls on them) Ah ha! Plumbers!

Luigi: No, he is. I’m just apprenticing him.

Officer: Get in the car!

Luigi: But I didn’t do anything.

Mario: Are you telling us that you can arrest a guy for being a plumber?! Get outta here!

Officer: Get in their plumber! NOW!

Mario: Hey! What is this?

Luigi: Alright, alright. What do we do?

Mario: I’m getting arrested for being a plumber.

Luigi: Write his number down.

---

Sergeant Simon: Name.

Mario: Mario.

Sergeant Simon: Last name.

Mario: Mario.

Sergeant Simon: (to Luigi) Okay. What's your name?

Luigi: Luigi.

Sergeant Simon: Luigi Luigi?

Luigi: No. Luigi Mario.

Sergeant Simon: Okay, look, how many Marios are there between the two of you?

Luigi: There's 3. There's Mario Mario and Luigi Mario.

Sergeant Simon: Mike! Mike! Help these Marios around the side.

---

Toad: (sings) Oh, oh, oh.

I'm sittin' here in a cramped detention,

with brothers from another dimension.

Thinkin' 'bout my... (stops) Say, what's another word that rhymes with "Dimension"?

Mario: Yeah, tension, and I'm full of it, so shut up.

---

(in the squad car, a wanted poster of the Mario Bros. flashes on a TV screen naming them Alien Plumbers)

Luigi: Aliens? We gotta deal with aliens too?

Mario: Luigi, we're the aliens!

Luigi: We are? Wow, cool!

---

Sergeant: Nobody touches President Koopa!

Luigi: (rubs his eyes in pain) You're Koopa?! But you said you were one evil...

Koopa: ...one evil, egg sucking son of a snake. Did I lie?

---

Koopa: Now, where's the rock?

(Iggy and Spike look at each other, then at Koopa)

Iggy and Spike: Rock, sir?

Koopa: The meteorite piece that she wears around her neck, and I told you not to forget it!

Spike: That rock!

Iggy: I told you not to forget it!

Koopa: And I told you to remind him! Without that piece, the meteorite lays dormant. I'll not be able to merge the dimensions! Where is it?!

Iggy and Spike: (nervously) The plumbers took it.

Koopa: (whispers) Plumbers? (to Lena) Plumber alert!

---

(the Marios try to escape in a police car)

Mario: Where's the starter on this thing?

Luigi: I got a feeling about this, Mario-roni.

[types the codes to the strange controls to start the car]

Mario: I didn't know you could do that.

Luigi: Comes from sittin' on my butt all day playing video games. That's what.

---

Sergeant Simon: Mario Brothers!

Mario: (in his cell with Luigi) Yeah! That's us! You better get a lawyer or get us outta this chicken coop!

Sergeant Simon: You got one.

---

(the Marios capture Iggy and Spike and tie them near lizards)

Mario: If you two don't start talkin', we gonna leave you to these guys for lunch.

Luigi: Now, where's Daisy?

Spike: No, no, no, no. Where's the rock, scallywag?

Luigi: Where's Daisy, butt breath?!

Iggy: Where's the rock, over-weaning rogue?!

Luigi: Not 'til you give us Daisy, biscuit head!

Spike: Where is the rock?!

Mario: SHUT UP!!