List of Super Paper Mario quotes

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The following is a list of quotes from Super Paper Mario; they are listed alphabetically by character.

Bestovius

• "Who is this meager mustache, and how does it have the audacity to address my muli-colored glory?"
• "You must be the great hero... IMPERSONATOR!"
• "What a costume! You look like you leaped right out of the pages of the Prognosticus!"
• "Why should the hero have the whole world delivered to him on a well-garnished platter?"

Bowser

• "Bwa ha ha ha ha! "We're under attack!" You jokers are the best!"
• "Hey who are those hairy guys in the back? We SHAVE around here, minions."
• "Bah! Mario... AND Luigi?! How'd you get in here?...What? My front gate was open?! How many times have I told those idiots?! If you're the last in, LOCK THE GATE!"
• "I'll tell you who doesn't make even a little bit of sense... Count Bleck!
• "Enough! Release Princess Peach, right now! I'm on a schedule over here!
• "Bwah ha ha! Will I marry Peach? Are you kidding me? The answer's YESSSSSSSS!"
• "MARIO! ...and Princess Peach?! Why do you ALWAYS have to do that. That's like the 1000th time you've shown up at my castle and screwed everything up!"
• "No more sequels! It's gonna end right here, right now. ONCE AND FOR ALL!"
• "But... But I'm Bowser! I'm grade-A, 100% prime-cut final boss! I'm going to take over the world any day now! No way am I helping Mario! He's always trashing my awesome plans."
• "What'd you say? If the world ends, there's not gonna be any world for me to rule?"
• "Don't get all cuddly with me, Mario."
• "NO! I'M NOT SWEET!"
• "Fine... C'mon. Let's get your stupid Precious Heart, or whatever you call it."
• "Yeah! Anyone who wears a cape and a monocle is just begging for a beating."
• "Trust me, any problem comes up, I'll stomp it into next week! I'll Bowserize it!"'
• "Who are you supposed to be, Mr. Frilly Pants? You gonna tie me a balloon animal?"
• "Bwahah! You're such an idiot! This place makes me stronger too!"
• "Dimentio? Gimme a break! That's the lamest villain ever!"
• "Pbbtth! Wanna know how to thank me, bugface? Just stay outta my way, OK?"
• "Oh YEAH! I can breathe! But now my nose itches! Man, I hate space!"
• "Good gravy, you're ugly!"
• "Space niblet! You OK?"
• "Hrmm... Mr. L. What a nutjob."
• "Huuuuurgh! Mt brain hurts! I can't keep up with plot points this complicated!"
• "Huh? What're you looking at, rocklips? You never seena burly king of evil before?"
• "Hold up. Did I just hear the word 'UGLY'?"
• "WARGH! What are... HEY! Hands off the merchandise!"
• "Pbbbbbbth! Like I'm afraid of danger! Please!"
• "Count Bleck, Floro Sapiens, whatever... Stomping fools is my business! Show me a to a fool, and I'll stomp it! I don't even need a reason!"
• "What am I, blind? Shut up."
• "Hey O'Fatty! Take it easy! You're gonna blow out your beard, pal, seriously."
• "You need stomping. And I'm a Stomptologist."
• "Man, what a crybaby."
• "You part of that idiot's crew? Get back and report to your boss, you lazy worm!"
• "Oh, PLEASE! You know what you smell like, weirdo? FEAR. Stop crying and fight!"
• "Whoa, whoa, WHOA! I don't fight veggies!"
• "Think you can dent a shell as burly as THIS, pretty boy? Let those Cragnons go!"
• "'Challenger'?! Bwahahahaha! All I'd have to do is sit on you and wear you like a hat!"
• "I don't know who you are, but I got a 'rousing spectacle' for your face!"
• "Hey! I'm not fat! I just got a big shell."
• "Minions need to learn respect."
• "That Mr. L freak is a total insano."
• "Where am I?! And why do these jerks in shades keep jumping me?! And what's with the dark? And Peach isn't here... and I'm hungry! What did I do to deserve this?!"
• "You wanna break up what me and Peach have going!"
• "Dang! Why do I always lose?! What is WRONG with me?!"
• "She's gotta be feeling lonely without her burly, awesome hubby at her side!"
• "Hey! Shut yon trap, fluffy! You're talking about the WIFE of Lord Bowser!"
• "Man, all I hear is CRYING! Show a little initiative! Can't we just rebuild the bridge?"
• "Are we gonna group-hug? Enough pep talk, gramps! I'm doing this for ME!"
• "I've had egg-salad-sandwiches chunkier than this guy."
• "Hey, there's no shame in being smacked down by a huge, studly boss!"
• "Hey, Super Stupid Bros.! Get the princess into the next room NOW!"
• "Come on! Man up a little. You never give up this easy when you attack MY castle!"
• "[[Tippi]! Yeah, you're right. C'mon, let's jump him!
• "You believed your prophecy, and we believed in mopping the floor with you!"
• "Now THAT is a plan! Make a path!"
• "Shadoo, boo-hoo, whatever. What a waste of my time!"

Count Bleck

• "Bleh HEH HEH HEH BLECK!"
• "Your princess has been taken... by Count Bleck!"
• "By me... Count Bleck! The chosen executer of the Dark Prognosticus... is Count Bleck! The fine fellow prophesied to come to this dimension... is also Count Bleck!"
• "Bleh heh heh heh heh... This pleases Count Bleck!"
• "Aside from Timpani, no treasure mattered in the least to me..."
• "WHAT?! ... Spat Count Bleck in utter disbelief."
• "Bleh heh heh heh heh... The man known as Blumiere died a long time ago. Now there is only Bleck! The Dark Prognosticus's choice to fulfill the prophecy! Nothing more!"
• "Ah, I see you've come at least! So, you really ARE the hero of the Light Prognosticus..."
• "But you are far too late to stop the Dark Prognosticus, and me... Count Bleck! Come into grips for that now, for you cannot stop it. I suggest you make yourselves comfortable and enjoy this one, final spectacle!"
• "Count Bleck does not care about any world! They are all meaningless."
• "You know the answer, dear Timpani. Count Bleck does not have to tell you. The hour has grown too late... You should know that by now."
• "Count Bleck is the deleter of worlds! My fate is written in the Dark Prognosticus! ALL NOW ENDS!"
• "Leave me, Nastasia. I will deal with these two ALONE."
• "Count Bleck demands it! I will not say it again..."
• "Are you prepared, hero? Our duel will be worthy of the last clash this world will ever see!"
• "How laughable! Is that all the heroism you can muster? Let me show you real power!"
• "Bleck! I expected more potency from the Hero of Prophecy! And now, I will watch your game end, and then your precious worlds will end soon afterwards!"
• "Bleh heh heh heh... So, you ARE alive, then!"
• "What's this? My barrier is... GONE?!"
• "Then so be it... says Count Bleck! But your precious worlds aren't safe until my last breath. Let us finaly end this! Now, the TRUE battle begins... with Count Bleck!"
• "BLEHHHHH!"
• "Ex...Excellent... You have won... Now finish Count Bleck. The Chaos Heart will disappear, and the prophecy will be undone..."
• "Timpani... After you vanished, I searched long for you. I never stopped looking. I searched and searched, but I never found you. Without you, the world held no meaning or joy. I wanted to destroy everything that's taken you away from me..."
• "It's too late. Count Bleck has done so much evil... it must end. Just knowing that you are alive, and the world you live in will continue... it gives me peace. I do not have long to live... you must end my game before The Void destroys all..."
• "Na-Nastasia!"
• "No... stop!"
• "We cannot. Without the Pure Hearts, all worlds are doomed. All we can do now is give up..."
• "It was no lie. But without the power of the Pure Hearts, there is no way to counter the Chaos Heart. What can we do?"
• "My minions... how did you find us here?"
• "My loyal minions..."
• "What's this? The Pure Hearts?! But why?"
• "So, it seems the end of all worlds is really upon us..."
• "I thought the Chaos Heart would disappear if the person controlling it fell. Dimentio... must have left behind a shadow of his power to continue controlling the Chaos Heart. It won't last long, but it'll be enough to ensure the end of every world."
• "There's only one thing left that we can do... This way!"
• "Timpani, do you still love me?"
• "Then you must come with me."
• "We will use the Pure Hearts again this time, to banish the Chaos Heart. All we need is true love, and that's something I am lucky enough to possess."

Dimentio/Super Dimentio

• "I thought Mimi's idea of a perfect world had gem-filled swimming pools and hunky lifeguards?"
• "So very nice to meet you... and your mustache!"
• "I am Count Bleck's master of dimensions, the pleaser of crowds, I am...Dimentio!"
• "Ciao!"
• "And so I strike, like a sudden windstorm at a kindergarden picnic!"
• "And so you've come to play, like late-sleeping toddlers!"
• "You must be Bowser. I knew the moment I saw the flailing nubbins you call arms."
• "And now, we must duel like two, glearing banjos on a moon-lit stoop!"
• "Ah ha ha ha. And so we meet again, like two large, burly dinosaurs with indigestion!"
• "Now remember kids: eat your vegetables to grow big!"
• "The forlorn group of heroes, how they cry! Their tears flow like sad chowder!"
• "Don't you know who I am? I am your enemy, Dimentio! I serve Count Bleck!"
• "Say... Just one moment, my dear count. Does this name 'Blumiere' ring a bell?"
• "The mustached man's Pixl went on and on. She said, 'I must stop Blumiere!' But I suppose there's no reason to pay any mind to the ramblings of a Pixl."
• "Ah, I see you're missing the ravishing princess and the arm-flailer."
• "Enjoying my game of tag?"
• "Ah ha ha ha. Oh, no. Magic is no laughing matter. I am always deadly serious."
• "So, you spit upon my offer? You have wasted my time. And for that, your game ends. I think I'll start with the green one. The shag upon his lip will make a fine trophy!"
• "And so I strike, like a speeding dodgeball at an echoing gymnasium!"
• "I needed the Pure Hearts to defeat Count Bleck. I couldn't do that on my own, so, I had you do all the sweaty labor for me. If they make greeting cards to thank people for helping with evil plans, I owe you one!"
• "I am saying that you no longer have any value to me, so I'm ending your games. They're all yours now, Mr. L!"
• "Ladies and gentlemen, get ready for the greatest magic show you'll EVER see!"
• "Count Bleck! You looked so tattered and pathetic, I nearly forgot about you!"
• "I'll squeeze the life out of you later. Just wait around in that dimension, OK? Great."
• "The Chaos Heart is mine! I will use it to destroy all words and create perfect new ones! Shall we get started, then? I have all I need now... to become the king of all worlds!"
• "I am invincible! There's nothing you can do! And now, it is time for the destruction to begin! Let it begin with YOU, as you wallow around in helplessness, like upside-down turtles! L-POWER!"
• "Let's stop wasting time and finish this, shall we? Ciao!"
• "W-WHAT?!? The Pure Hearts?!? I thought you wasted them all, fighting Count Bleck!"
• "Noooo... I'm not invincible anymore..."
• "G-GAH?!"
• "How did you do it... How could I have lost with the power of Luigi and the Chaos Heart? And the prophecy... Has it been undone?!"
• "Oh, this isn't finished... You can't escape... I've been saving one last surprise for last! Ah ha ha ha ha... Ciao!"

Flint Cragley

• "Lesser Cragnons would weep softly."
• "Suddenly... Out of the cave mists... mysterious, slavering creatures lurched into view!"
• "Had the gods of adventure forsaken us?"
• "Cragley Ho!"

Francis

• "Nerrrrr herrr herrrr herrrrrr! This is so hi-technicaaaaaal!”
• "NOOOOOOO! MY GRAPHICS CAAAAAAAARD!"
• "Freel the wrath of the jilted X-Naut from the season finale of "The Grodus Chronicles!"
• "MERCY!"
• "My high-technical battle skills have failed me! I'm gonna return home and run a simulation on my computer to figure out what went wrong!"

Luigi / Mr. L

• "That's my bro, always bouncing back! Like me! I bounce too!" - Luigi
• "I'm my bro's bro." - Luigi
• "The G-Great Luigi, you say? A... A daring defender? ...Me? Then I've got no choice! Luigi must spring into action! My fans need me!" - Luigi
• "Oh, me? Just one of Count Bleck's more promising minions. The Green Thunder... MR. L!" - Mr. L
• "Just because you're in red doesn't mean you're strong. Have at you!" - Mr. L
• "Ooh, the evil king of all charlatans! Do I look scared? Have at you!" - Mr. L
• "Hey, Mr. Getsfoiledallthetimebytheredguywiththemustache! I'll foil your FACE!" - Mr. L
• "I uh... got to go deflavorize the Brobot's uh... Flavorizer." - Mr. L
• "Hey there, butterball!" - Mr. L
• "Hey, King Incompetant! I'm gonna hatch an evil plan on your FACE! Have at you!" - Mr. L
• "T-Toad?! What? What happened? Why are you so crazy?" - Luigi
• "Everyone runs out of extra lives sometime." - Luigi
• "Quiet, you big Bowser! We know you kidnapped Princess Peach! Now where'd you put her?!" - Luigi
• "Looks like your pure heart thing got broken. I guess pure hearts can't handle the end of the world. Heh. Whatever, I'll swipe it just for kicks." - Mr. L
• "GREEEEEEEEN!"

Luvbi

• "I am sorry...that thou art so hairy."
• "Pray, I would understand this! Is yon Peach the lady friend of Mario?"
• "Oh, verily? But the damsel looms large in his regard, is this not so? A one-sided crush then, mayhap."
• "Heareth me, princess of silly peaches?"

Mario

• "There might not be any world left for you to rule!"
• "Deal!"
• "Too rich for my blood."
• "You're shady..."
• "Forget it!"
• "No way."

Mimi

• "Surprise! It's me, Mimi!"
• "Coins?! No one uses COINS anymore, you peasants! I SPIT on your coins!"
• "You DUMMIES! The only reason I'm here is to GET in the way!"
• "I'm not all soft n' cuddly like the count is."
• "I like getting what I want, and I'll do whatever I have to to get it!"
• "You're the one that's always having to get rescued by boys. THAT'S embarassing!"
• "Boy, it sure would be sad if your boyfriends had to cry over spilled Peaches!"
• "Gosh, I could follow your big smile anywhere, Count!"
• "I got hired on by Merlee as her maid for real this time!"

Nastasia

• "I'm just gonna pencil you in for a ten O' clock brain washing k."
• "If...If I could have been that girl maybe things would be different."
• "Yeah, I'm afraid you orders mean nothing anymore."
• "WAH! Count you can't leave me!"

O'Chunks

• "CHUNKS AWAY!"
• "JUNIOR?! C'mere un' I'll introduce yeh to Fist Jr. an' his wee pal, Slappie!"
• "A Stomptolo- 'EY! SHUT IT! Don't yeh go tryin' teh be wittier than me, yeh frog!"
• "Maybe I misunderstood that weirdo..."
• "YEH CRAZED LOON!"
• "BRO-CCOLI! CAB-BAGE! AS-PARA-GUS!" - O'Chunks brainwashed into "O'Cabbage"
• "Warrior rule # 1: 'Never fight on an empty stomach! 'Tis Madness!'"
• "'Ow could yeh be chunkier than I? Yer naught but a bloomin' turtle!"
• "Yer hands are quiverin' like a ladle of me mum's lard gravy."
• "Ah; she lies like a wee rug, this lass!"
• "Talk about goin' the extra mile! She even sacrificed 'erself to save ya! Lissen, Count, I promised me life as well, an' I'm not afraid teh live up to it! So, ya gotta lemme 'elp!"
• "'Ey, Count! What're yeh doin?!?"

Princess Peach

• "Ewwww, what WAS that?! What in the world did you just make me eat?!"
• "You stay out of it! I am a PRINCESS, and she has thrown mud at my dignity!"
• "Oh, what's the matter, little girl? Did I spank Mimi a little too hard?"
• "You've been very, very bad, but I can't just leave you here to die."
• "I don't know how you were raised, but I was taught to help people in need!"
• "We would never let you destroy everything, you awful count!"
• "I fell through too, and landed right on Bowser! It was a surprisingly soft landing..."
• "So, defeating Dimentio wasn't enough to stop it?"
• "How lovely! The bells are giving their blessing to Tippi and Bleck..."
• "The fact that something so evil lurked at the bottom of the Pit is quite disturbing!"

Shadoo

• "Don't get me wrong, the Ancients DID create me... But I work for my own cursed powers!"
• "Oh, heroes... Blessed souls. I MUST DESTROY YOU WITH THE POWER OF SHADOW!"
• "I was so... close to defeating the heroes... I was going to use the power of the Pixls to get revenge on the Ancients!"

Squirps

• "You're the ones looking for the Pure Heart, squirple? Hm! Cuter than I thought!"
• "I... I have to go potty! I REALLY have to go, squirk! I can't hold it anymore!"
• "At this rate, Squirps is going to have an accident."
• "Why are you staring like that? Are you falling for Squirps?!"

Tippi

• "Who are you REALLY, you incontinent little imp?"
• "What a wretch."
• "Where in the world are we? And what are you...things?"
• "Why would you do this?! How COULD you do this?!"
• "If the worlds have no meaning, does that mean OUR meeting was meaningless, as well! Answer me, Blumiere!
• "Pure Hearts are the very feelings of our souls. As long as we feel love, they live on! I will take these to Mario!"
• "Nothing is decided intirely by fate, you know... All things determine their destinies."
• "Goodbye now, Dimentio. We'll add a footnote to the prophecy about your failure."

Toad

• "M-M-M-M-M-M-M-Mario! Help! It's Sh-sh-sh-sh-shocking... Mushroom Castle... RAIDED! Princess Peach... STOLEN!"
• "We're counting on you, Mario...Bros.!"